Waste.

As some of you might know, I've recently deleted my Facebook, Twitter and Tumblr account. Later, I've made up new accounts which I have then made private, except for my Tumblr because nothing ever goes on there anyway. I've added most of my school friends on my "new" social networks and many have them have asked me why I did a new account. It took me a long time to decide on doing that. Especially since I've been caught up with certain things lately. SPM, and before SPM, preparing for SPM. Finally, a few days after my exams were over, I deactivated everything and started afresh.

A certain friend of mine called it as "a fresh new start". I would think so too.

You see, 2011 wasn't really an unforgettable year for me. As far as I can think about it, if I were able to delete memories in my mind, I'd immediately gather most of 2011 in a folder and permanently move them into Trash. Empty it. Therefore, I wouldn't be able to think about 2011 anymore. I wouldn't be able to think of certain regrets. Certain emotions I felt. I would call myself as a walking zombie in 2011. I didn't really achieve anything. I was more to being an individual. Trapping myself in my room, occupying myself with just my phone or doodling and writing things in certain books. 

I've gained new friends, I've lost certain friends. I've learnt the meaning of honesty and I've watched people play with my so-called "honesty". People have said many things about me. I've been accused of saying certain things I didn't do. I've heard people whispering behind my back. I've been used as a friend for only benefits. And to think I spent almost a year wasting my time "entertaining" mostly these people. It's sadistic. I guess what most of my older peers said was right; you know who your true friends are as soon as you finish high school.

I'm not saying I'm one angelic saint. Believe me, throughout seventeen years of my life, I've done bad things as well. At least at certain matters, I know my limits and I know where to put my foot down. Instead of being some sick puppy like I once was, taking every single shit people say about me to heart and injuring my own self-esteem, why should I even care anymore? It's certain some people are just going to stab you in the back and wait for the moment you fall down, but seriously? When you're looking back on who to pinpoint and blame, mirror yourself. It's your fault for making the person take control of yourself. Thus, why should I keep these people in my life?

I'm sick of high-school drama. I'm sick of "friends" whom are just there for enjoyment. I practically loathe people who use others just for the sake of their own pleasure and self-satisfaction and seriously. I'm not that pathetic to let any of these people to take over my life and make my life a living hell.

So fuck all of you who have practically tried to ruin my life with your lies, your so-called "comfort", for trying to make me look as if I'm the #1 pathetic human being in the world. See, I don't live on planet Earth to please anyone, except my parents. And if you do have an issue with me trying to grow up, then I suggest you get a mirror and think back, what you mean to me. Because honestly, people who live just to hate others and ruin them for no valid reason, are just examples of failures unsatisfied with their own lives. Take a reality check as well, because it's easily said and seen - you mean nothing to me.

# Honestly. Making a new Facebook and Twitter account was one of the best decisions I have ever made in 2011. Other than the fact that I'm finally going to pursue my dream to become a journalist that is ;)