One-way Ticket Back Please?

I’ve been thinking a lot about home lately.

How I’d wake up in my pink and green walled room, with sunlight piercing through my white blinds. The first thing I would do is go downstairs, make sure all my cats were alive and well-fed, then pick one of them up and enjoy another 15 minutes cuddling a ball of fur. How every morning, my mom made me toast. Usually overly buttered, with a generous spread of marmalade on top, I’d snack on that while laying down on our red sofa scrolling through Instagram thinking where else I would eat next. When there was sunlight back home, my life wasn’t really productive. But as the day ended, I would normally be out with my friends. I remember my dad would tell my relatives the only way to sense whether my bank account was still “alive” was to spot how constant my red car was at home. And I reminisce the times, I would drive back home from Subang or Kuala Lumpur at night. Bass, extra loud, listening to my playlist of hits. How Honne’s Someone That Love You would be on repeat, as I watched the highway lights pass me by. One by one.

 I miss the familiarity. I miss home.

12 Hours in Paris

I guess, now I understand why they call Paris "The City of Lights".

I needed to get away from the FOD fuss and classes were piling up like crazy. I must admit, I'm more than tired this semester and it's only just begun. I needed a getaway and as always, a trip across the English Channel was a comforting one. On Saturday morning, we were randomly browsing through cities and somehow ended up boarding a bus to Paris two hours later. I told Naqib that my previous experience in the capital was not a memorable one. There were places I didn't go, and things which just made me not 'get the hype'. That, of course -- changed tremendously.

The day started with a quick climb to Sacre Coeur followed by gazing at the windows of shops in Champs-Elysee. I had fun risking my life to take a photo in the middle of Arc de Triomphe and we met Lady Eiffel with a cheeky Nutella crepe. He brought me to La Fayette's rooftop where I gazed upon the city lights of Paris. What a better way to end the night than with a midnight stroll as we waited to board our bus back to Lille.

-- oh and can I just add, the Indian food in Paris is amazing?!

Just A "Lille" Birthday Treat

A few days before my birthday, Naqib invited me over to celebrate. Of course, I was a bit sceptical. One, he is never nice to me - all throughout our little Iceland trip, we were basically on a sarcasm war with each other, and two, I was not sure what to expect. The last time I had met Naqib at that time, things were pretty awkward that we didn't even bid proper goodbyes. 

After consulting Erina and Hud and their firm persuasion that it may be a "once in a lifetime" opportunity, I bought a bus ticket dated for a day after my birthday. I boarded a bus with Salah at 3AM to London and endured another 5 hours, alone, conquering two seats to Lille, France. 

We spent the first day chilling, eating tacos and watching some movie I can't remember. The next day he brought me around the city. From having French cuisine for lunch, surprising me with my one and only birthday cake for the year, a lovely tour of the Art Museum and ending the night by seeing the beautiful night lights Lille had to offer - he made sure that the 5 hours (+ 1 hour claustrophobic EuroTunnel experience) journey was worth it. 

A weekend art flea market which sold magazine cover artworks and books mostly in French.

The funny story behind this surprise was he spoke French to waiter telling him to bring the cake with a candle on top. The waiter, of course was dumbfounded that since I was there listening to the conversation the whole time that was until Naqib told him I had no idea what they were speaking in French, lol. 

Being an avid lover of cheesecakes - of course, I was estatically over the moon when this arrived with a cute pink candle on top. Hands down, best cheesecake I've ever tasted.

Christmas decorations were still prominently displayed around the city - even on the 7th of January.

  

We ate a lot that weekend - definitely a huge difference than the dry tuna or shredded chicken and mayo sandwiches we gobbled just for the sake of being full while in Iceland. I learned a lot of French history and how its architecture varied from North to South. He even made me walk in the cold, with my high heeled boots to see a unique church with no windows (he legit made me guess for five minutes what made the church unique until I realised.. "oh yeah, no windows"..). Probably a city worth visiting again and definitely an amazing way to celebrate my 23rd birthday.

To another year of thrilling wanderlust, random adventures (+ decisions) and a heck load of ups and downs along the way. I'm looking forward to see how this year is going to be like! (winks)

The Story of Angus

Iceland, was a series of events on its own - mostly unfortunate, but we managed to pull through, alhamdulillah. On the 26th of December, we checked out early in morning. The weather was again, about the detrimental but we were used to it. Sunrise was late in Iceland, so even at 8AM, the city was dead, pitch black. Only the lights of Christmas decorations brightened the roads - heck, even some of the street lamps were dead. Our ETA was in about 12 hours, from Fáskrúðsfjörður to Reykjavík and the slippery roads almost caused our car to skid off a cliff, but we managed to pull through seeing a scenic sunrise from the highway, surrounded by snowy mountains, lakes and eventually the sea.

About 3 hours in, that was when we met Angus.

Angus was a beauty of its own. Angus was a compilation of every terrain on Earth. Angus, was load as it crashed its waves on it black pebbled sand beach. Angus - was everything more than I imagined any beauty of Earth would be. The best part was, Angus was ours and only ours. There was not a single other human being at sight. As soon as we got out of the car, we ran on Angus's rocky mini-cliffs, we crossed its fresh mountain water river, and we caught sight to its frozen ice lake which reflected the surrounding mountains beautiful. I was speechless, and a part of me was left teary eyed. Erina, was bawling at its beauty. Even the boys, were astounded by the beauty of Angus.

That vivid feeling,

of what I want, what I need, what I deserve.

I am more than what I had limit myself to,

and in the brief moment of contentment - I let go.

I finally felt free.

A part of me felt like the Almighty opened the secret doors of Angus just for us - and I was, truly, deeply blessed. It was surreal, it was.. magical. I sat on its black sand terrain, and I began to reflect. How life was before Angus, and how much I've missed out on life - on how much, I've missed myself. 

I bid farewell, to you my old friend - 2016.

And I welcome you, 2017. 

With an open heart, with open arms. 

Talk Enough Sense, You'll Lose Your Mind

I guess I’ve lived with a heart full of love for years, having it empty feels a little bit weird. Even though I may come off bitter, its better to at least have an emotion than none. Eitherway, thankful for this bunch for being with me this week - feeling homesick, torn, and just lost in this city. 

 

Constantly reminding myself - I am strong and I needed this to be independent. Though we made a million plans to one day be here together, I hope you know that some things are for the best.